You say she got upset.
As you well know, that part of you that is upset that she is upset is the same as the part in her that is upset. To have an upset is different from being upset. Having an upset is natural. Part of your system — body, mind, emotions, is disturbed — by the energy. But being upset means that you have part of you projected out and away from yourself, to her. You have not accepted that part of you enough to be beyond needing someone to be a certain way, or not be a certain way, for you to stay in balance. So the only thing is to accept and love, that part of you, and that part of her.
When you are clear yourself you can then see what you can do for her. Of course, never support anyone’s neurosis — in fact, it is better to make it even more clear; put the phone down on her; repeat to her clearly what she is asking you to do what she is not doing herself. And so on. Often writing is more effective than talking.
The main thing is not to take it seriously, and if you do take it seriously, don’t take being serious seriously.
I send you much love dear friend… Paul